Do you believe in the scales?

So many of us are so focused on numbers....

We worry about money, about our age, about our weight - it's all about the numbers. I'm no different. I worry about my weight, about finances, about time (usually worrying about the quantity, not the quality of it), among other things. One of the things we, as parents, worry about the most is our children's weight.

All of my children have been little, when it comes to weight. They've always been in the 5th-25th% with their weight. Baby #3 is the one exception - he was in the 75th% for awhile, but is now down to the 50th%. For awhile, doctors were threatening to diagnose Baby #1 as "Failure to Thrive" because he was in the 3rd percentile for pretty much the majority of his first year. I was so upset about that, and I could write a whole post about just that experience, but just let me say that he was thriving and I argued that case for pretty much 6 months of his life that he was just in the lower percentile of babies (which would be why it's a percentile, by the way - someone has to be in the lower part of it!!). He met all his milestones, walked and talked right on time, and grew on his own curve (i.e. never fell off the chart at any point).

Baby #2 and Baby #3 have been bigger than Baby #1 (and still are - he's still tiny for his age), but they've all been below average weight. And for each of their short lives, it's been all about the numbers on the scale or on the height charts. We seem to forget that life is more than just the numbers - there's a lot to be said for overall health. While each of my children have been on the smaller side, they have all developed "on time" and in some areas, are at the top of the scale (academics for Baby #1, physical ability for Baby #2, we're still waiting for Baby #3, but I'm pretty sure he's going to be incredibly smart and quick-witted with the way he keeps us laughing!). As a whole person, they're each a fun bundle of strengths and weaknesses, which you can't experience if you focus only on the numbers. My "failure to thrive" baby is a smart, caring, social butterfly of a little boy, and hasn't failed to thrive at all in his short little life.

You're probably wondering why I'm writing about this. Well, I didn't manage to weigh myself this morning. Baby #2 woke up with my alarm, and I didn't manage to get on the Wii - he was super needy this morning. I'm planning on doing it in a few minutes, while the two little ones play happily after their lunch. But, all morning, I've felt incredibly guilty about not weighing in to report to you guys. I've felt like a failure because I don't have the numbers to record. Nevermind the fact that my smaller clothes all still fit (including the new jeans that I had to buy while in Michigan because my old ones were falling off), and I'm making healthy choices with my food/drink intake. It was all about the numbers in my mind.

Then, in talking with a friend, we started chatting about the BMI scale, and where we fall on it and where we should fall on it. Seeing as it's been almost 8 years since I last looked at my "ideal" weight, I thought I'd look up where I should be, according to the BMI scale.

I was SHOCKED to say the least.

According to the BMI scale, to get into the middle of my "healthy" weight range, I needed to lose 110 pounds from my starting point.

GASP!! (let it all out - we'll have a collective catching of our breaths)

110 pounds!?!?!? That's insane!! That's 30 pounds LESS than the weight I was at my smallest, healthiest point. The point where I hit my Weight Watchers goal and stopped going to the meetings on a weekly basis. The weight I was at when we got married.....and the weight that I'm aiming for on this journey.

I can't imagine being the weight that was my "healthy" weight. (and mind you, that 110 pounds was only to get to the MIDDLE of my healthy BMI range - it would have been 120 if I wanted to get to the lowest "healthy" BMI). I honestly think that weight would be too skinny for me - which led me to wonder how much the number really means. Is the BMI scale like my children's weight as babies? Are we focusing too much on the number on the scale and not on the lifestyle changes or milestones met?

I really wonder if we are. And I wonder if we're not setting our children up for the same kind of focus on numbers, with our focus on them having to be in the 50%-75% when they're babies. With every one of my boys, we were pressured to try and "plump" them up to get past that 50% mark on the charts. Now, I'm trying to decrease my weight to get down UNDER that 50% mark on the BMI scale. Are we setting our children up for a life of focusing on the numbers?

Will they miss out on seeing what they CAN do because they're focused on the charts?

As I sit here, I realize that I spent all morning feeling guilty about not knowing my numbers on the scale, and ignoring the fact that I had a fun-filled morning with my children before school, that I managed to knock things off of my to-do list which will let me sit back and have fun with my kids tonight. I've been a pretty good mom today - so why does it matter that I didn't weigh myself?

Have you checked out your BMI lately? Check it out here.

And then let me know what you think!